The Dance

It’s been a minute and when I say these two months have been one for the record books.. I can’t lie. So many things have happened. So many big things. So many bizarre things. I just sit back and think man…I could write a book…but who would read it. Lol.

Emotions have the best and worst of intentions. They will make you say and do things you would never do. So will menopause but that’s another post.😳

I have lost a lot of people in the last few months. People I am not sure if they knew how much they meant. My childhood friend, someone who was like a mom to me growing up, an irrational customer and a tf…true friend. All were very important to me and all I don’t exactly know and understand why but here I sit perplexed at it.

My childhood friend passed away and I wasn’t even aware she was that sick. That was on me. I assume life got busy and I didn’t see the forest for the trees. This one will haunt me and also teach me to tell those I love daily. To check in on my people. My mom’s friend who was like an aunt also passed. It was sudden and she wasn’t sick… to our knowledge. She was so sweet and just always easy. My friends and I could barge into her house off of Center road at any time. She had the neatest house. (Part underground) She never minded. She let us come in and just be there. She and her family were mine… I know she knew I loved her. Never a doubt.

Then there was this irrational customer. I failed her. I did. Sometimes we do. She wouldn’t let me make it up to her and I tried countless times. She wasn’t ever really an easy customer but I wanted to fix her and help her. In return… she taught me I am human and I fail. I just have to do my best and continue on.

My tf.. truest friend. That one came out of nowhere. I assume you allow people in. Not everyone sees the real Amy. I mean.. there are versions of her but the real one.. just my inner circle and I had invited them in. We shared about our kids, our jobs, our families, life, disappointments. Probably helped me get through my divorce and made me remember who I was and what I brought to the table.

All 4 losses. All needed for some reason. I needed to be taught to value old and new friendships and to check on people because of Shannon. I learned to be thankful for my Linda and the role she played in my life. The memories etched in my heart. My customer taught me to slow down. To check things out and to be more present. To also give myself some grace.. even when I don’t do it all perfect.

And my true friend.. well some friends pass through for a season. To teach you something valuable. To remind you of your biggest blessings or the biggest lessons. I guess I will never know but I’m better for it. I had them all in my world for a moment and isn’t what this life is made of? Moments…. Some that change you, some that break you and some that define you. Be thankful for your moments. Today I walked out of a doctors office with a good report and perhaps a better attitude. Just to be thankful. The old song says I would have missed the pain but I’d of had to miss the dance. No way…I never want to miss the dance.